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Official post UK Meet up thread!

gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Official post UK Meet up thread!
on: April 19, 2009, 08:21:50 PM
Ok you'll have to forgive me for once again trying your patience, but despite my best effort's I'm stuck writing the bloody aftermath once more ::) Ok so allow me to set the scene dear readers...

As you may have noticed, there's been the odd one or two threads about the meet up, nothing too high profile, as we Brit's are a quiet, low key group of fellows, who hate to draw attention to ourselves, as to do so would be vulgar! :D But with a date set, and shedule to keep, we made our way to our secret destination in the wilds of Wolverhampton to keep a date with destiny...

The first of our elite group was young Squire Beneth, who had to leave his humble abode at an unearthy hour to come and pick me, his Lord and Master!, up in our chariot for the day, which will henceforth be know as the Salon of Wild Suspension! So overloaded was our poor beast of burden, that on several occations, I'd have to throw my noble, well sculpted body, to one side or the other of the conveyance, to prevent it rolling over onto it's side in the corners (yes really! :o)

After enduring several hours of my Squires appaling company, bad machine control, and poor personal hygiene, we retired to a charming little sevice station to use the facilities, upon entering the toilets, the charming shop assitant issued me a pair of wadders, and a peg for one's nose, as the toilet was sadly quite fouled >:(

Meanwhile young Clown Jester Ryan had managed to achieve passage on a steam locomotive without incuring the wraith of the Watch, who usually regard young Ryan with an unhealthy degree of suspicion, on account of his terrorist like look's. And after he left said train he encountered the Chief Modding Engineer to the Court of Micky, Sir Neil. Where they both used one of Sir Neil's new fangled internal combustable engines, and with much haste they quit the evil station with it's smoke belching iron horses for the cheery abode of Sir Dave, Chief Supplier of Rusty Tool's to the Realm, where they once again they transferred there wears, from one shoddy smokey conveyance to another, and with that done, made there way to our secret venue.

Meanwhile having divested myself of awkward bladder related baggage, and also a sizeable amount of crowns on some truly awful peasant fare for our journey ahead, I retired to our Salon of Wild Suspension to eat the peasant snacks and give some oat's to Squire Beneth, when I spied the not quite so young Sir Gareth! In all fairness, our galant Scotsman was not too difficult to spot, thanks to his long beard, tied back in iron bands, the long kilt, and the bulging sporan, but most strikingly of all was the claymore at his belt, and the blue war paint upon his face! After having aproached him carefully, as he does cut quite the fearsome figure, we found out that in a fit of Scottish fury, he'd slain his Squire, for a crass joke at poor Bravehearts expence! And so was in need of a Squire to direct him to the venue. Sadly I had to refrain from lending him mine, as Squire Beneth was needed to direct my Most Royal of Personages to the meet!

So a compromise was reached, and Sir Gareth would follow us in his war chariot for most of the way (he got lost :D).

All the while Sir Nick Copperlot, Defender of the Crown Jewels( :D) conversed with myself and the other dignatories, as to where we all where, so as to facilitate our smooth arrival.

After having found the site despite my Squire insistance on getting us lost at every opportunity, simpy because of his inability to follow the Fair Maiden GPS's instructions, we were meeted and greeted by Sir Copperlot and dirrected to where we would be spending the next 2 days :)

After showing us around the site which I'm (genuinly) not aloud to tell you about!, we settled in to a good long discussion about all thing's sharp and shiney, with a simply biblical number of Sak's, MT's, Knives and Axes on offer, and some very rare exotica at that too, while we waited for the other's to arrive.

And after about an hours wait, our errant adventures Sir Neil, Sir Dave, and Court Jester Ryan arrived, shortly followed by Tamer of Ridiculously Fast MotorBikes Sir Phil, and then there was much toolage fondleage :drool:

Thing's however were starting to look grim, as despite the glorious weather, there was no colour in our lives, as we're just men, fanastic example's, if more than a little ugly, but men nonetheless :(

We we're missing the Maidens...

And loe, after battling with a most virulent of pox's, they did return to us, and there was much rejoicing, as Lady Chris, and her fair Hand Maiden Lady Minty, did brighten our lives :)

And now the meriment could begin in earnest!

But first I had to deliver some bitter sweet news, Sir Frances Dunc could not make it to the meet :(, as he was defending our trade against the tyranicle Spanish Fisherman!, but not to be outdone, he offered to provide the lucky winner of the a secret ballot, the chance to win a gorgeous Swisschamp!

This was to be decided later however, as first there was games to be played!

Sir Gareth produced a pair of throwing axes for our amusement, and after finding a suitable target (Ryan and Ben would have made too small a target) we found a small log to hurl the axes at with all the martial prowess at our disposal. All but Sir Coppalot missed on our first try. We can only put it down to his having warmed up in the Royal Torture Rooms first, as his repeated hit's we're too consistant to be simple flukes, but we consoled our selfs with the fact that, though a warrior born, his interpersonal skill's leaved a lot to be desired, so much so that he aggrieved Lady Minty so much so that she gave him a look so withering, that it would have castrated a lesser man! :D

So with the night drawing in, and with full stomachs, we needed a fire and a big one! Sir Copperlot had constructed a very rickity raised fire pit, which though sound at the time, would cause no end of problems later on, but first we need the fire, so calling upon the bushcraft skills, matched only by Sir Bearly frauduntly Grilled we set too getting the fire started all the while, Squire Ben and Jester Ryan danced around the place with small black boxes that flashed annoyingly!

Sir Gareth, Lady Minty and Lady Chris and myself, set to spliting the wood for some feather sticks, and Lady Chris who aparently dables in arcane alchemy, produced small grey/silver metal shavings, the once struck, seared into blinding, if short, life. All the while Sir Gareth and Sir Copperlot attacked the log's with Claymore and my holy Kukri of Justice :)

Lady Minty asked if she could use my as yet untried and untested GB Mini Hatchet, and I agreed. So after having tied a beautiful paracord ribbon to it's haft, she struck the wood with a vengence, while cackling manically :o

So with night arrived, conversation flowed, it was time for the fair maidens to go, and dim our lives somewhat :(

Sir Gareth then uttered his unforgivable faux pas, to which there was much :twak: :D the Ladies did take there leave...

Then suddenly, a fierce and feral howl rent the night air :o

The fair maidens, naturally clung to me for protection, as apart from my shere physical power, I was clutching the Royal Paddle of arse whipping!

So with the maidens clinging to me, yet bravely now armed, we advanced on the sound, closely followed by the other, lesser men, now shamed by my, and the maidens example of courage :salute:

In the near total dark, and with just the light of the fire and the ocational strobing fenix to guide us, our fur clad tormenters revealed themselves :o

A score or more of lupine shapes emerged from the gloom, with teeth beared, and hackles raised, they advanced on us at the run, Wolves! That ancient and primordial enemy of all that's good and righteous in the world >:(

Mustering into a wedge formation with myself at it's tip, as befits my status as a natural leader of men (and Fair Maidens) we gave battle, despite the unforgetable aroma of some of the younger amongst us voiding there bowels ::), the first wolf lept atLady Chris who produced another handful of hot balls, and cast them into the hoard, immolating several of the fiend's, to my left Lady Minty eviserated one wolf from groin to sturnum with the Mini Hatchet, and cleft a second's skull in two on the return pass. The youth that was Squire Ben and Jester Ryan twisting and turned around the wolves, striking left and right with borrowed Sebbie's, at a speed that was dizziying to the older and more broken amoungst us.

Sir Dave was busying himself by burying LM Charges into the exposed flanks of the wolves, using the Realtree camo Charges to steel upon his opponents >:D Sir Neil far from idle was throwing broken, half modded, sak's into the hoard, the 91's making a particularly satisfying 'thwacking' noise as they penetrated the hide's of the beasts!

Sir Phil using the reflexes born of riding scary mortorbikes, defended and reposted, with a grace born of years of stunting :)

Sir Gareth became lost to the redmist that so curses his bloodline :(, with an angry howl of his own, the equal of that of the wolves, he wadded in with his Claymore, decapitating, evisterating, and disembowling with every arc of his most lethal of blades, carving a red ruin with every step he made :o

But where was Sir Copperlot? had he fallen to the claws of out adversaries? Or had he given into his basest instinct's and turned tail, and run?...

NO! With a mighty neigh, our attention was drawl to a might Bretonian Steed of pure white, that went by the mighty name of Murph. And upon it's broad back, sat a warrior of huge beer fuelled physique, with long golden hair that cascaded over his police issue armour plate.

With a bold Yah he spurred might Murph into a gallop, smiteing the remaining foes with his array of Kirridasi's, and trampling the remained under Murph's emmence hoves!

So with our nemesis driven before us, we assembled at the Fair Maidens royal blue conveyance, and after a powerful and tear choked embrace, they left us, to lick our wounds, and to stare out into the cold, cold night...

Then the Fire pit gave way, spilling embers everywhere, and much destruction was wraught! And with that we retired to out sleeping chambers.

And cold it was, certainly it was arround freezing, and none of our might troop got much in the way of rest :(

But the morning came, and after righting the fire, and eating a hearty meal of Pot Noodle, we set about putting the world to right's, discussing tool's, and the forum that is MT.O :) Then with heavy heart's it was time to break camp and set of on our respective long trek's home :(

Sir Dave called me over to his Battle Wagon, I assumed it was to help him lift his Warchest of rusty LM Ammo, but no, I was simply needed to kick the Jester Ryan back into the glove compartment, to free up some much needed room :)

And so we we're for the off, first to go was our now gore clad Sir Gareth then the rest of us followed suit :(




All factual joking aside, i had an absolutly great time, and i'd like to thank everyone for there time in making it such a great event :)

Special thanks should go to Dave for the wonderful wood Scaled Climbers, and to Neil for the Whistles (let's hope Nick looses his before the next meet ::) :D) and Ryan for his lanyard :)

And thanks you Gareth for the Ferro rod, I'll treasure it mate :)



« Last Edit: April 22, 2009, 10:36:24 PM by Micky d »
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gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #1 on: April 19, 2009, 08:22:33 PM
Please be kind Ladies and Gentleman, that crap took me 2 hours :-[ :D
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Offline Leatherman123

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #2 on: April 19, 2009, 08:30:45 PM
That was an excellent write up!  :tu: I am quite impressed!  :o  :pok:

It sounded like great fun!  :)
B


england Offline Benner

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #3 on: April 19, 2009, 08:36:10 PM
Very good mate.  :D

I second what Mike said, thanks guys.  :cheers:  Those SAK's Dave were simply superb.  :tu:
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gb Offline Roadie

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #4 on: April 19, 2009, 08:36:37 PM
Great write up you tugboat :D Nice factual retelling :tu: Pics to follow in a bit :)
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hn Offline cliosguy

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #5 on: April 19, 2009, 08:38:01 PM
i sincerely hope so :pok: , sounds like you guys had a great time :cheers:
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gb Offline nuphoria

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #6 on: April 19, 2009, 08:40:43 PM
Excellent stuff Mike... and mostly accurate  ;)

Now one of you bleeders have to tell me what tugboats is all about or I'll set the hedgekid on you?  :pok:
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gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #7 on: April 19, 2009, 08:42:07 PM
Excellent stuff Mike... and mostly accurate  ;)

Now one of you bleeders have to tell me what tugboats is all about or I'll set the hedgekid on you?  :pok:

Flash will break first, he can't take her steely gaze :D
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us Offline Spork, Lord of Lime Jello!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #8 on: April 19, 2009, 08:48:31 PM
Well done and not too many made-up words...


us Offline turbov21

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #9 on: April 19, 2009, 08:48:39 PM
Best write up ever!  :salute:


gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #10 on: April 19, 2009, 08:50:24 PM
Thanks guy's, I thought i'd try something different, like telling the truth :salute:
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gb Offline Roadie

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #11 on: April 19, 2009, 08:51:00 PM
Thanks guy's, I thought i'd try something different, like telling the truth :salute:

Good man :) Those wolves were actually quite cute close up 8)
Life is like a sandwich...the older it gets the crustier it becomes!


gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #12 on: April 19, 2009, 08:52:23 PM
Thanks guy's, I thought i'd try something different, like telling the truth :salute:

Good man :) Those wolves were actually quite cute close up 8)
Is that why you 'voided you bowel's' then ??? :D
Give in, buy several Farmer's!!!!!!


us Offline turbov21

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #13 on: April 19, 2009, 08:53:23 PM
After a bit of thought, is it just me, or does "Salon of Wild Suspension" sound like a name Neal Stephenson would use in some novel?  It has a particular ring to it that I like. :)


gb Offline Roadie

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #14 on: April 19, 2009, 08:54:00 PM
Is that why you 'voided you bowel's' then ??? :D

No i just caught a glimpse of your ugly mug in the polished steel of the "Royal Paddle" :D
Life is like a sandwich...the older it gets the crustier it becomes!


gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #15 on: April 19, 2009, 08:54:41 PM
Is that why you 'voided you bowel's' then ??? :D

No i just caught a glimpse of your ugly mug in the polished steel of the "Royal Paddle" :D
:D :D
Give in, buy several Farmer's!!!!!!


gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #16 on: April 19, 2009, 08:56:19 PM
After a bit of thought, is it just me, or does "Salon of Wild Suspension" sound like a name Neal Stephenson would use in some novel?  It has a particular ring to it that I like. :)
I can't say I've heard of him :think:

But I'll look him up :tu:
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england Offline Dunc

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #17 on: April 19, 2009, 08:59:31 PM
Nice one Mike  :tu: Hell For a minute or two I was there  :D


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us Offline Spork, Lord of Lime Jello!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #18 on: April 19, 2009, 09:02:19 PM
 :ahhh
wolf.jpg
* wolf.jpg (Filesize: 49.19 KB)


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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #19 on: April 19, 2009, 09:36:02 PM
Duuuuuude,

What can I say other that

"THAT WAS THE BEST WRITE UP EVER  :salute: :salute: :salute: :salute: :salute:"

Also, as you say most of it happened.  Really fantastic time reflected by a brilliant write up.

Here's to the next one. :cheers:

(Anyone else going to have a go at their version of the events?)



scotland Offline Gareth

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #20 on: April 19, 2009, 09:39:09 PM
Wow Mike, I can't get past the detail and accuracy of the re-telling.  Anyone reading that should feel like they have been transported there.  Good job mate.  :tu:
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gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #21 on: April 19, 2009, 09:50:29 PM
Thanks guy's :cheers:

As per Nick sugestion, how about telling your own story of the meet :)
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gb Offline Roadie

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #22 on: April 19, 2009, 10:07:44 PM
Pictures :ahhh :ahhh :nanadance: :nanadance: :ahhh :ahhh Click for bigger pics :) Any meet members who would like any bigger pics let me know and i can sort you out :) Oh and feel free to make up comments for me :D










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gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #23 on: April 19, 2009, 10:08:54 PM
Bloody good pic's mate, you've even managed to capture my handsome, aquline features :tu: :D
Give in, buy several Farmer's!!!!!!


gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #24 on: April 19, 2009, 10:11:07 PM
I can see where Minty brutalised your F1 Ryan :( :D
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england Offline Benner

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #25 on: April 19, 2009, 10:13:11 PM
Great pics mate.  :tu:

Ryan, you've got mail.  ;)
I'm back!!


gb Offline Roadie

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #26 on: April 19, 2009, 10:15:27 PM
Great pics mate.  :tu:

Ryan, you've got mail.  ;)
Cheers :tu:
So i have!! :)
Life is like a sandwich...the older it gets the crustier it becomes!


england Offline DaveK

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #27 on: April 19, 2009, 10:21:25 PM
Oookay... my write up.

Sewing, no inflatable pillows or batteries, traffic, Villa Park, Roses place, wrong turn, back up, gate, Nick.

Gareth, Ben, Mike & Phil, sharp stuff, Nuphoria and Minty - chucking axes.

On the roof, nice view, vultures, lost gun (tugboat), wolves.

Air rifle, cooking, aliens,, SOG Twitch II fire, cold, small tent.

More cold, bacon butties, sunshine, swapsies, Burger King.

That about sums it up. ;)
I used to come here a lot.


gb Offline Mike, Lord of the Spammers!

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #28 on: April 19, 2009, 10:23:01 PM
Oookay... my write up.

Sewing, no inflatable pillows or batteries, traffic, Villa Park, Roses place, wrong turn, back up, gate, Nick.

Gareth, Ben, Mike & Phil, sharp stuff, Nuphoria and Minty - chucking axes.

On the roof, nice view, vultures, lost gun (tugboat), wolves.

Air rifle, cooking, aliens,(Image removed from quote.), SOG Twitch II fire, cold, small tent.

More cold, bacon butties, sunshine, swapsies, Burger King.

That about sums it up. ;)
If only i could be so concise ::) :D
Give in, buy several Farmer's!!!!!!


Offline Hedge Kid

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Re: Official post UK Meet up thread!
Reply #29 on: April 19, 2009, 10:34:55 PM
I can see where Minty brutalised your F1 Ryan :( :D

 :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[
Ok, Nuphoria has explained (at length and repeatedly) what I did wrong and why I should be thoroughly ashamed of myself. I am and I'm really really really sorry.

I genuinely didn't look at it and thought it was Nuphoria's beater  :-[ I got a little distracted by the shiny chemical burniness.

*hangs head in shame*

I


 

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