[CLOSED] 8th Anniversary Celebration Def Roast!

[daverobson]

[bmot]

I do find this hard... Def seems to be roasting himself continuously, so finding something original can be quite tricky.

[derekmac]

There's one thing about Grant that might upset some here.  He has a really low opinion of others.  He considers them equals.   

[Aloha]

I do find this hard... Def seems to be roasting himself continuously, so finding something original can be quite tricky.

These were my thoughts exactly.  What has he not said about himself yet  .  I wish he wouldn't take himself so serious   

[Monrogue]

There's one thing about Grant that might upset some here.  He has a really low opinion of others.  He considers them equals.   

Good one

[captain spaulding]

All the ladies say Def's the fastest 

At deploying his tool?

 

[derekmac]

All the ladies say Def's the fastest 

At deploying his tool?

 

He thinks it's a Super Tool, but it's really only a Micra!

[bmot]

All the ladies say Def's the fastest 

At deploying his tool?

 

He thinks it's a Super Tool, but it's really only a Micra!

Well, at least it's spring loaded then?

[detron]

All the ladies say Def's the fastest 

At deploying his tool?

 

He thinks it's a Super Tool, but it's really only a Micra!

Well, at least it's spring loaded then?

Yes,  a Squirt!  ........   

[Whoey]

leave it to this forum to side track such a thread... 

[detron]

leave it to this forum to side track such a thread... 

yep,  but the OP made it soo tempting

[derekmac]

leave it to this forum to side track such a thread... 

It got side tracked, just like Def's chromosomes.

[Monrogue]

All the ladies say Def's the fastest 

At deploying his tool?

 

He thinks it's a Super Tool, but it's really only a Micra!

Well, at least it's spring loaded then?

Yes,  a Squirt!  ........   

Oh man, this conversation has me laughing at work   This is great stuff

[Etherealicer]

You're just a little boy, you think you're so cute,
You must talk so big, to make up for smaller things.



I mean the Jeep of course

[Millhouse]

Very well done Etherealicer. 

[daverobson]

Trivia time
This was made in Hope, British Columbia, the same town that Rambo First Blood was filmed in.

[Nhoj]

Def blames the wet air when his tools rust in his pockets, but maybe it's actually his wet pants.

[daverobson]

One day an Englishman, an American, and Def walked into a pub together.
They proceeded to each buy a pint of Molson Canadian.
Just as they were about to enjoy their beverage three flies landed in each of their pints.


The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.

The American fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.

Def picked the fly out of his drink and started shaking it over the pint, yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT!!!"

[daverobson]

[Whoey]

One day an Englishman, an American, and Def walked into a pub together.
They proceeded to each buy a pint of Molson Canadian.
Just as they were about to enjoy their beverage three flies landed in each of their pints.


The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.

The American fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.

Def picked the fly out of his drink and started shaking it over the pint, yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT!!!"

Sadly, this would only really happen if he ordered Labatt's Blue...

[Corwyn]

[Etherealicer]

Call that a hairy chest ??

Or was that just the patch you missed when you shaved.

Don't worry he got chest hair, once puberty hit him a couple of days ago:

[Monrogue]

 

[derekmac]

I almost threw up when I saw that.      Which is ok, cause I actually did puke when I saw Def for the first time!!

[daverobson]

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM CANADA WHEN ...

1. You only know three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.

2. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

3. Canadian Tire on any Saturday is busier than the toy stores at Christmas.

4. You've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.

5. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow.

6. You think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons.

7. The local paper covers national and international headlines on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.

8. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.

9. You find -40C a little chilly.

10. The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freeze.

11. You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelery and your Sorels.

12. You understand the Labatts Blue commercials.

13. You perk up when you hear the theme from "Hockey Night in Canada".

[daverobson]

Def finally got his Canadian history exam results back.. He got an EH

[daverobson]

If you're pressed for time don't ever try buying 'AA' batteries in Canada.

[daverobson]

In a train car there were an American, a spectacular looking blonde, a fat lady and Def. During the trip the train passes through a dark tunnel, and the unmistakable sound of a slap is heard. When the train exits the tunnel, Def had a big red slap mark on his cheek.

The blonde thought – “That Canadian idiot wanted to touch me and by mistake he must have put his hand on the fat lady, who in turn must have slapped his face.”

The fat lady thought – “This dirty old Canadian laid his hands on the blonde and she smacked him.”

Def thought – “That crazy American put his hand on that blonde and by mistake she slapped me.”

The American thought – “I hope there’s another tunnel soon so I can smack that stupid Canadian again.”

[Monrogue]

Lol!  Nice ones daverobson

[jerseydevil]

Def finally got his Canadian history exam results back.. He got an EH