Funny email

[Grant Lamontagne]

I just got this and wanted to share it with everyone...

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1. IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, SIMPLY POUR A CUP OF BOILING WATER DOWN YOUR THROAT. PRESTO! THE BLOCKAGE WILL INSTANTLY REMOVE ITSELF.

2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.

3. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

4. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.

5. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

6. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE.  IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.

8. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.

9. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.

DAILY THOUGHT: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.


Def

[Mike, Lord of the Spammers!]

Great email all I get is request's for help

Number 4 and 9 are the best though

[WhichDawg]

that's funny! 

I'm gonna steal it and call it; "Amazing Home Remedies for Blondes!"

[Grant Lamontagne]

Go right ahead!  Get some good mileage out of it!

It's rare that I ever hear any jokes I've never heard before, but there were a couple here that were new to me.

Def

[edap617]

Just got this email quiz.

WORLD'S EASIEST QUIZ
(Passing requires 4 correct answers) NO CHEATING!

1. How long did the Hundred Years' War last?

2. Which country makes Panama hats?

3. From which animal do we get cat gut?

4. In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

5. What is a camel's hair brush made of?

6. The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?

7. What was King George VI's first name?

8. What color is a purple finch?

9. Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

10. What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?

Remember, you need 4 correct answers to pass.


Check your answers below.


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ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ

1. How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years

2. Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador

3. From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses

4. In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November

5. What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur

6. The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs

7. What was King George VI's first name? Albert

8. What color is a purple finch? Crimson

9. Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand

10. What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange

What do you mean, you failed? Me, too.

[Poncho65]

I fancy both list  and I failed the last one  Defs list does make one think would some ppl be stupid enough to try some of those things like # 1 4 6 my answer is yes there are all kinds of stupid out there