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The Smurf Game 369

No Life Club Posts: 3,084 You don't want to see me SMURF!
The Smurf Game
« on: March 17, 2017, 06:32:02 PM »
So, I decided shamelessly steal MadP's idea from the potato game, and create a new one...

Let's call it... "The Smurf Game" ;)

Take a movie, TV or a book quote and change one word on it to... you guessed it, Smurf.

Still following me you bloody smurfs? :D

Couple of examples:

From 2001: The Space Odyssey: "Sorry Dave, I can't smurf that."

From Sledge Hammer!: "Trust me, I know what I'm smurfing!"

and finally...

From Braveheart: "SMUUUUUUUUUURF!"

Let's get smurfin'!

:serverloft:
This totally useless, but possibly hilarious game brought to you by "Completely Random Smurf with Aleph"!
« Last Edit: March 17, 2017, 06:37:04 PM by Aleph78 »



"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."
- Douglas Adams

Completely Random Smurf with Aleph
Slingshot Channel
Colin Furze Thread
No Life Club Posts: 1,057 Hook enthusiast
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2017, 06:38:03 PM »
:like:

Indiana Jones:
"Its not the years honey, its the smurf."

Hooked, like everyone else. :D

Small knives do what big knives do, just slower.
No Life Club Posts: 1,970
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2017, 06:58:13 PM »
Yoda quotes...

"The Smurf is strong with this one"

"You must unsmurf what you have smurfed"

"Clear your mind must be if you are to find the smurfs behind this plot"

"Feel the smurf!"

"Hmm. In the end, smurfs are those who follow the dark side."


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
No Life Club Posts: 1,776
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #3 on: March 17, 2017, 07:15:42 PM »
"Say hello to my little smurf."
- Scarface
« Last Edit: March 17, 2017, 07:17:53 PM by gdoolittle »
No Life Club Posts: 2,455 Look at all those shiny sharp things.
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #4 on: March 17, 2017, 08:17:56 PM »
Hasta la vista, smurf
No Life Club Posts: 1,057 Hook enthusiast
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #5 on: March 17, 2017, 08:41:29 PM »
Great Smurf!

Hooked, like everyone else. :D

Small knives do what big knives do, just slower.
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #6 on: March 17, 2017, 09:00:10 PM »
Who said that? Who the smurf said that? Who's the slimy little communist smurf twinkle-toed smurflicker down here, who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy smurfing godmother said it! Out-smurfing-standing! I will P.T. you all until you smurfing die! I'll P.T. you until your smurfholes are sucking buttermilk.

Show content
I am Gunnery Sergeant Hartman, your Senior Drill Instructor. From now on, you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be "Sir!" Do you maggots understand that?

Sir, yes, sir!

Bullsmurf! I can't hear you. Sound off like you got a pair.

Sir, yes, sir!

If you ladies leave my island, if you survive recruit training... you will be a weapon, you will be a minister of death, praying for war. But until that day you are pukes! You're the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human smurfing beings! You are nothing but unorganized grabasstic pieces of amphibian smurf! Because I am hard, you will not like me. But the more you hate me, the more you will learn. I am hard, but I am fair! There is no racial bigotry here! I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers. Here you are all equally worthless! And my orders are to weed out all non-hackers who do not pack the gear to serve in my beloved Corps! Do you maggots understand that?

Sir, yes, sir!

Bullsmurf! I can't hear you!

Sir, yes, sir!

What's your name, scumbag?

Sir, Private Brown, sir!

Bullsmurf! From now on you're Private Snowball! Do you like that name?

Sir, yes, sir!

Well, there's one thing that you won't like, Private Snowball! They don't serve fried chicken and watermelon on a daily basis in my mess hall!

Sir, yes, sir!

Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?

Who said that? Who the smurf said that? Who's the slimy little communist smurf twinkle-toed smurflicker down here, who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy smurfing godmother said it! Out-smurfing-standing! I will P.T. you all until you smurfing die! I'll P.T. you until your smurfholes are sucking buttermilk.

Was it you, you scroungy little smurf, huh?!

Sir, no, sir!

You little piece of smurf! You look like a smurfing worm! I'll bet it was you!

Sir, no, sir!

Sir, I said it, sir!

Well... no smurf. What have we got here, a smurfing comedian? Private Joker? I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and smurf my sister.

You little scumbag! I've got your name! I've got your ass! You will not laugh! You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers. I will teach you. Now get up! Get on your feet! You had best unsmurf yourself or I will unscrew your head and smurf down your neck!

Sir, yes, sir!

Private Joker, why did you join my beloved Corps?

Sir, to kill, sir!

So you're a killer!

Sir, yes, sir!

Let me see your war face!

Sir?

You've got a war face? Aaaaaaaagh! That's a war face. Now let me see your war face!

Aaaaaaaagh!

Bullsmurf! You didn't convince me! Let me see your real war face!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!

You didn't scare me! Work on it!

Sir, yes, sir!

What's your excuse?

Sir, excuse for what, sir?

I'm asking the smurfing questions here, Private. Do you understand?!

Sir, yes, sir!

Well thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?

Sir, yes, sir!

Are you shook up? Are you nervous?

Sir, I am, sir!

Do I make you nervous?

Sir!

Sir, what? Were you about to call me an smurfhole?!

Sir, no, sir!

How tall are you, Private?

Sir, five foot nine, sir!

Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked smurf that high! You trying to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh?

Sir, no, sir.

Bullsmurf! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you've been cheated!

Where in hell are you from anyway, Private?

Sir, Texas, sir!

Holy dogsmurf! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy! And you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck dicks!

Sir, no, sir!

Are you a peter-puffer?

Sir, no, sir!

I'll bet you're the kind of guy that would smurf a person in the ass and not even have the goddam common courtesy to give him a reach-around! I'll be watching you!

Did your parents have any children that lived?

Sir, yes, sir!

I'll bet they regret that! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece! What's your name, fatbody?

Sir, Leonard Lawrence, sir!

Lawrence? Lawrence, what, of Arabia?

Sir, no, sir!

That name sounds like royalty! Are you royalty?

Sir, no, sir!

Do you suck dicks?

Sir, no, sir!

Bullsmurf! I'll bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose!

Sir, no, sir!

I don't like the name Lawrence! Only smurfs and sailors are called Lawrence! From now on you're Gomer Pyle!

Sir, yes, sir!

Do you think I'm cute, Private Pyle? Do you think I'm funny?

Sir, no, sir!

Then wipe that disgusting grin off your face!

Sir, yes, sir!

Well, any smurfing time, sweetheart!

Sir, I'm trying, sir.

Private Pyle, I'm gonna give you three seconds--exactly three smurfing seconds--to wipe that stupid-looking grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-smurf you! One! Two! Three!

Sir, I can't help it, sir!

Bullsmurf! Get on your knees, scumbag!

Now choke yourself!

Goddamn it, with my hand, numbnuts!!

Don't pull my smurfing hand over there! I said choke yourself! Now lean forward and choke yourself!

Are you through grinning?

Sir, yes, sir!

Bullsmurf! I can't hear you!

Sir, yes, sir!

Bullsmurf! I still can't hear you! Sound off like you got a pair!

Sir, yes, sir!

That's enough! Get on your feet!

Private Pyle, you had best square your ass away and start smurfting me Tiffany cuff links... or I will definitely smurf you up!

Sir, yes, sir!
No Life Club Posts: 1,143
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #7 on: March 17, 2017, 09:09:29 PM »
Zoid has been let loose!

Buy now or regret later
No Life Club Posts: 1,143
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #8 on: March 17, 2017, 09:10:40 PM »
THIS... IS... SMURF!

Buy now or regret later
Head Turd Polisher Administrator He who has the most nuts, wins! Posts: 55,935 Optimum instrumentum est inter aures
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #9 on: March 17, 2017, 09:54:28 PM »
Some classics from Ahnold...

I'll be smurf.

Come with me if you want to smurf.

Your smurfes.  Give them to me.

I am the smurfenor of Smurfifornia.

Def





No Life Club Posts: 3,084 You don't want to see me SMURF!
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #10 on: March 17, 2017, 11:06:58 PM »
Are you not smurfing entertained?

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."
- Douglas Adams

Completely Random Smurf with Aleph
Slingshot Channel
Colin Furze Thread
Admin Team Absolutely No Life Club Posts: 14,117 Sir Kirk of Blamington Hall
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #11 on: March 17, 2017, 11:35:28 PM »
I'm so trying to think of a good Sean Connery quote from The Smurf for Red October :think:

Mind you,from Highlander: There can be only smurf!

Smoke me a kipper,I'll be back for breakfast!

There is no beginning,or ending,and for this we are thankful,cos now is hard enough to understand!
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,635
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #12 on: March 18, 2017, 01:37:35 AM »
:popcorn:

I am terrible with movie quotes but love this game guys :D :like: :like:

No Life Club Posts: 3,084 You don't want to see me SMURF!
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #13 on: March 18, 2017, 08:37:12 AM »
Not really that long ago, in a galaxy not quite that far away...

Dark Helmet: Who made that man a gunner?
Major Smurf: I did sir. He’s my cousin.
Dark Helmet: Who is he?
Colonel Sandurz: He’s a smurf sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that! What’s his name?
Colonel Sandurz: That is his name sir. Smurf, Major Smurf!
Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
Colonel Sandurz: He’s a smurf too sir. Gunner’s mate First Class Philip Smurf!
Dark Helmet: How many smurfs do we have on this ship, anyway?
Entire Bridge Crew: Yo!
Dark Helmet: I knew it. I’m surrounded by smurfs!
...
Dark Helmet: Keep firing, smurfs!

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."
- Douglas Adams

Completely Random Smurf with Aleph
Slingshot Channel
Colin Furze Thread
No Life Club Posts: 3,084 You don't want to see me SMURF!
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #14 on: March 18, 2017, 08:45:02 AM »
I'm going to make him a smurf he can't refuse.

 :ahhh

 :D

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."
- Douglas Adams

Completely Random Smurf with Aleph
Slingshot Channel
Colin Furze Thread
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #15 on: March 18, 2017, 09:09:51 AM »
Smurf me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast.
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #16 on: March 18, 2017, 09:13:02 AM »
Are you suggesting smurfs migrate?
No Life Club Posts: 3,084 You don't want to see me SMURF!
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #17 on: March 18, 2017, 09:18:10 AM »
Are you suggesting smurfs migrate?

None shall smurf!

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."
- Douglas Adams

Completely Random Smurf with Aleph
Slingshot Channel
Colin Furze Thread
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #18 on: March 18, 2017, 09:19:09 AM »
Smurf's dead baby, Smurf''s dead.
No Life Club Posts: 3,084 You don't want to see me SMURF!
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #19 on: March 18, 2017, 09:21:31 AM »
Are you smurfing to me? ARE you smurfing to ME?

 >:D

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."
- Douglas Adams

Completely Random Smurf with Aleph
Slingshot Channel
Colin Furze Thread
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #20 on: March 18, 2017, 09:23:04 AM »
...you've gotta ask yourself one question, do I feel lucky, well, do ya, smurf?
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #21 on: March 18, 2017, 09:25:26 AM »
You can't handle the smurf!
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #22 on: March 18, 2017, 09:29:27 AM »
I ate his liver with some fava smurfs and a nice chianti.
Absolutely No Life Club Posts: 5,478 Cats have pocket knives of their own
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #23 on: March 18, 2017, 09:32:51 AM »
I'm too old for this smurf!

Omnia vincit amor. Vae victis.
Absolutely No Life Club Posts: 5,478 Cats have pocket knives of their own
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #24 on: March 18, 2017, 09:36:01 AM »
You are one ugly smurfersmurfer!

Omnia vincit amor. Vae victis.
No Life Club Posts: 1,057 Hook enthusiast
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #25 on: March 18, 2017, 09:39:58 AM »
To seek out new smurfs and civilisations....

Hooked, like everyone else. :D

Small knives do what big knives do, just slower.
Absolutely No Life Club Posts: 5,478 Cats have pocket knives of their own
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #26 on: March 18, 2017, 09:41:49 AM »
To boldly smurf where no-one has smurfed before.

 :rofl:

Omnia vincit amor. Vae victis.
Absolutely No Life Club Posts: 5,478 Cats have pocket knives of their own
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #27 on: March 18, 2017, 09:43:22 AM »
Frankly dear I don't give a smurf.

Omnia vincit amor. Vae victis.
Absolutely No Life Club Posts: 5,478 Cats have pocket knives of their own
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #28 on: March 18, 2017, 09:44:21 AM »
Smurf, Forrest, smurf!

Omnia vincit amor. Vae victis.
Global Moderator Absolute Zombie Club Posts: 25,371
Re: The Smurf Game
« Reply #29 on: March 18, 2017, 09:44:41 AM »
Some folks call it a smurf blade, I call it a kaiser blade.

 

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