Stories at Security Checkpoint

[Corwyn]

I always remove my cutting tools when I board a plane.

However I usually keep the survival kit with some toys for Geocaching.

I was exchanging planes in Berlin when they stop me.. this is a weapon... they point at my flashlight...

Batteries were dead so I took it apart to show them the bulb.. still they insisted it can be used as a mace.

In the end they let me keep it...

Honestly I'm not mad at them I'm mad at the silly Chinese putting silly strike bezels on everything (like a plastic edge would be of any use...)

It was one of these contraptions... didn't even know that was a strike bevel in the zoom lens until they pointed it out:

[Don Pablo]

Be careful with the last pic, pfrsantos, otherwise they may confiscate your brain.   

My security story? I had to take off my shoes, while my sister did not have to. Why? I mean, the only difference was that her runners were smaller than mine.
Did they think I was more likely to conceal a weapon in my shoes?

[glenfiddich1983]

I don't have any interesting security stories, other than that they almost always pick me out of the line on airports to frisk me. Apparently I fit in some kind of profile 

[Grant Lamontagne]

I have a lot of frustrating security stories, and sadly on both sides.  I had one guy try to come into a club I was working at once with a Kershaw Speed Safe opener.  I don't recall what model,but it was olive drab, with a black blade and I'm pretty sure a stag head laser etched into it.  I wouldn't let it into the club for obvious reasons and buddy decided to argue with me.  He was a real winner too, just barely passing our dress code as well, and he wasn't happy.  The girl with him, obviously even less of an intellectual as he was asked why I wouldn't let him in with it, after all, he had a license to carry it.   

For those unfamiliar with Canadian Law, there is not now, nor has there ever been a license to carry a knife. 

I also got trapped in O'Hare by a storm on my way home from SHOT in '08.  In the confusion of trying to re-route thousands of passengers they seemed to have lost my suitcase.  I ended up on a flight to Toronto the next morning (huge, long, messed up story there I won't go into now) where I went through Canadian Customs.  Bear in mind, I'd been awake for roughly 36 hours by this point, and the Customs people have no sense of humor.  Or decency.  As I approached the counter I noticed the officer I was getting was an attractive female, and long experience has shown me that attractive females in uniform are either very nice or very nasty, with very few in the middle ground.  She was a nasty one, demanding things from me that my exhausted brain had trouble keeping up with.  Apparently she took it as a personal offence that I allowed the airline to lose my bag at my previous layover, and that I already knew they were lost.  In her mind, no one should be told these things.   

She saw my SOSAK T shirt and asked if I had anything in my lost luggage that might be considered dangerous and I told her that I had Swiss Army Knives in my bag.  She asked if I had any on me, to which I responded no, and that even if I did have any when I left, I'd been through several security screenings since leaving my hotel, and any I did have would be long gone by then anyway.  She responded by writing KNIVES in giant red letters across my boarding pass, and sent me for additional screening.

As I got to the next section I got this rather large, somewhat unattractive woman, ad now I had KNIVES written on my documentation, I figured I was in for a body cavity search.  As it turned out, this woman was actually very pleasant, and even she wondered why the other one had written KNIVES on my boarding pass.  I was so surprised by her decency I was unsure of how to react when she smiled and told me to go on ahead.  I asked if this was a trick, if I was going to get ten feet away and she was going to sound the alarm and I was going to get tackled and she just laughed.  I left very cautiously, still not sure I wasn't being set up.

That was probably the last time I have ever had issues with security in an airport.  Nowadays, regardless of the weather outside I wear a light shirt, shorts and flip flops or sandals, and check a bag with any tools or anything even remotely dangerous looking in it.  I also don't bring toiletries with me- I buy new ones when I arrive, then toss them when I leave.  The only things I have on me (or my carry on) are my laptop and phone.

I totally disagree with this kind of treatment, but it is not a fight you will win in an airport, and it can cost you thousands of dollars and years of your life trying to straighten out even the slightest misunderstanding, and frankly, to me that is just not worth it.  Never put your safety or well being in the hands of someone else.

Def

[Etherealicer]

I think the most interesting thing is that people around the world have different worries and that is reflected in the airport security checks.

In 2003 I did a flight around the world Zurich - San Francisco - Los Angeles - Auckland (NZ) - Hong Kong - Zurich

US - I had to take off my shoes and they were scanned for explosives. They didn't find any but learned that Swiss Cheese can have a lot more flavor than they are used to

NZ - They politely asked if they could clean and sterilize my hiking boots. Sure, wouldn't mind a polish either

HK - I had to walk through a thermal image corridor in order to find people with the flu. Sure thing, I had a sore throat and got picked out (luckily I had no fever).

CH - Well, what is the worry in Switzerland? Money! They asked if I have anything that needs to be taxed

[Grant Lamontagne]

Because I have metal parts in my anatomy I always have to go through the naked body scanner.  If they are that desperate to see what I am compensating for with a giant tool collection then I am more concerned about them than I am any potential terrorists.   

Def

[G-Dizzle]

I will be flying for the first time in my life in late December to NYC. Hopefully I will have no security stories from that trip! I think I am being as careful as I can about everything. Definitely not trying to break any laws.

[pfrsantos]

Be careful with the last pic, pfrsantos, otherwise they may confiscate your brain.   

My security story? I had to take off my shoes, while my sister did not have to. Why? I mean, the only difference was that her runners were smaller than mine.
Did they think I was more likely to conceal a weapon in my shoes?

Yeah?! Well, go ahead, I never use it anyway...

 

[pfrsantos]

I don't have any interesting security stories, other than that they almost always pick me out of the line on airports to frisk me. Apparently I fit in some kind of profile 

Young and cute?...

 

[pfrsantos]

My closest to a security checkpoint story is from the post office. I ordered a Mora 511 knife, some paracord, a couple of firesteel rods and a S&W tactical pen.

The order was held at the customs section in the central post office. They had the contents list on the outside of the parcel and someone had circled with a large red marker the S&W tactical pen line, with two underlines in "tactical".

Apparently, something tactical is worse than a knife, something to make a fire or something to strangle people with...

 

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It's a good thing I didn't order the Casio PRW3510Y-1 I had my eye on...

[glenfiddich1983]

I don't have any interesting security stories, other than that they almost always pick me out of the line on airports to frisk me. Apparently I fit in some kind of profile 

Young and cute?...

 

Sounds plausible!

[Kampfer]

Security guards at amusement park gave me tons of smurf about the Classic SD on our key, forced me to walk a mile to put it back in the car; while my wife brought the Espada through for me without any issue.

These "weapon free zones" really bother me, giving a false sense of security and creating a perfect killing zone for predators.

[Don Pablo]

From a security standpoint, I would have been a [understatement] little bit more concerned about the Espada than a teensy little Classic. [/understatement]
Am I thinking irrationally here?

[aluminated]

Bill Bellamy, "Flip Flops".
Language is not kid-approved but the bit is hilarious.

I had a blue keychain LED light - NOT a laser - taken from me at a courthouse on the pretext that it "could be used to set off a device." The guard was correct, but I'd have to be within 5 feet of that device. Conveniently enough, the guards departed prior to my return. So went up to the next floor, found a supervisor, and had him pull the box of contraband to get my $5 toy back. Quite a few people did not have the same persistence I displayed.

[Old Boy]

I travel a lot for work so I got a few stories. The funniest one was when my carry on got checked by TSA at LAX. This was when the sonicare toothbrush first came out and probably not a lot of people knew what they were. The lady who opened my bag eventually let me through but I could tell from the way she gingerly handled the sonicare and the scornful look she gave me she thought it was....ahem.....a sex toy.

You can disassemble it so she probably just saw the handle and not the brush.

[Kampfer]

From a security standpoint, I would have been a [understatement] little bit more concerned about the Espada than a teensy little Classic. [/understatement]
Am I thinking irrationally here?

I think you are.
The Classic tasted blood and my Espada never did.

[ThePeacent]

From a security standpoint, I would have been a [understatement] little bit more concerned about the Espada than a teensy little Classic. [/understatement]
Am I thinking irrationally here?

I think you are.
The Classic tasted blood and my Espada never did.

haha it's usually the smallest that bite the deepest   

[Vidar]

Once I was at a market in Asia rather late in the evening. There were these guys going around selling all kinds of big kitchen knives and cleavers. They were actually ok and would solve some later Xmas gift problems. I ended up buying all he had with him - some 7-8 knives or so.

Later I go back to my hotel. For some reason there is an enhanced full scale security check outside; armed guards and bomb dogs included. A hotel lady politely asks me if I have any of the items listed on their poster of things considered dangerous. And of course, on the poster between guns, bombs, and cans of Swedish surströmming, there is a knife icon.

So I take my shopping bag and just empty it right in front of her. Big knives everywhere! The hotel lady got big eyes and made a gasping sound, the security guards closed in way fast and too close for comfort, and generally tense mood there for a moment. Not being a chef didn't help either.. Finally the manager arrives, my knives ended up in the hotel safe for the rest of my stay. Note to self; next time bring out any knives slow and after explaining.

Weird mood there for a moment though; I worried a bit about becoming the action highlight of the week for those guards.

[Don Pablo]

From a security standpoint, I would have been a [understatement] little bit more concerned about the Espada than a teensy little Classic. [/understatement]
Am I thinking irrationally here?

I think you are.
The Classic tasted blood and my Espada never did.

haha it's usually the smallest that bite the deepest   

Isn't that because you use them more often? 

[caninesapien]

No MT-related stories (thankfully) but here are a couple:

Flying back to the UK from Las Vegas a few years ago. The guy at passport control checks my passport/address details, then stops me and says "Sir, why did you come to the US?". This being the first time any of the security staff had asked me a question on that particular trip. I replied, "For a holiday." He replies "And you came to the US? You chose to come to the United States?" I was getting kind of nervous because I wasn't sure what he was getting at. "Yes, this is my first trip to the US." He checks my address details again, and says "I just don't know why you would come here...", then, in a booming voice, "BECAUSE YOUR COUNTRY MAKES THE BEST DAMN WHISKEY IN THE WORLD!" He slapped me on the shoulder and sent me through. Pretty strange!

Also, I recently flew back to the UK from Denver, CO. When we got back to our house, it was pretty late so we just threw our luggage into the room and crashed out. The next morning when I woke up, I unlocked my suitcase to unpack, and saw a very neat note explaining that the TSA had searched my bag. But the locks on my case were still intact! I thought the TSA broke locks open if they wanted to search? Or do they use some master key or something? Seems awfully courteous to unlock then re-lock my case after searching 

[moonweasel]

Also, I recently flew back to the UK from Denver, CO. When we got back to our house, it was pretty late so we just threw our luggage into the room and crashed out. The next morning when I woke up, I unlocked my suitcase to unpack, and saw a very neat note explaining that the TSA had searched my bag. But the locks on my case were still intact! I thought the TSA broke locks open if they wanted to search? Or do they use some master key or something? Seems awfully courteous to unlock then re-lock my case after searching 

You got lucky and found a non lazy TSA luggage inspector, There are about 10 different master keys for various TSA approved locks. I guess he had them all, and close by.
It is pretty common for them to just cut off the 'approved' locks.

[dbnyc]

OK I've got one.  This is before 9/11 so before TSA.  I was at a small rural airport flying home from visiting relatives.  My uncle had given me a cheap leatherman knock-off and I'd been carrying it around it in my jacket pocket, which is where it still was when he dropped me off at the airport.

I put my jacket through the x-ray machine and the x-ray operator stopped me after I walked through the metal detector "Is that a butterfly knife?"  I had no idea what he was talking about so he showed me on the monitor, and I remembered the multitool and explained, took it out of the pocket and showed him and he waved me on through, no big deal just a multitool not a butterfly knife.

I broke the thing later, it's long gone now but I didn't lose it to security.