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Sometimes I am so funny it hurts

Grant Lamontagne · 12 · 411
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ca Offline Grant Lamontagne

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Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
on: March 22, 2024, 12:10:05 PM
I had this conversation this morning while trying to replace a deadbolt before heading off to work.  I had just noticed that the circumference of the new deadbolt was slightly larger than the old one, and therefore wouldn't fit.  I needed to enlarge the hole.

Me:  It wont fit.  I need a hole saw.

Other person who shall remain nameless: A hole saw?

Me: Yes, a hole saw.

Other person: Why a hole saw?

Me: Because a half saw won't cut it.

Insert rimshot, drop mic and walk out.

 :rofl:

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us Offline David Bowen

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #1 on: March 22, 2024, 12:14:37 PM
There are those that appreciate Dad jokes, I sir think that was a Mike drop moment

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #2 on: March 22, 2024, 12:15:30 PM
Quote from: Grant Lamontagne on March 22, 2024, 12:10:05 PM
I had this conversation this morning while trying to replace a deadbolt before heading off to work.  I had just noticed that the circumference of the new deadbolt was slightly larger than the old one, and therefore wouldn't fit.  I needed to enlarge the hole.

Me:  It wont fit.  I need a hole saw.

Other person who shall remain nameless: A hole saw?

Me: Yes, a hole saw.

Other person: Why a hole saw?

Me: Because a half saw won't cut it.

Insert rimshot, drop mic and walk out.

 :rofl:

Def


 :rofl: :rofl:
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ca Offline Grant Lamontagne

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #3 on: March 22, 2024, 12:26:17 PM
Quote from: David Bowen on March 22, 2024, 12:14:37 PM
There are those that appreciate Dad jokes, I sir think that was a Mike drop moment

Sent from my SM-G996U using Tapatalk

Such a waste- the Dad jokes are strong with this one but I completely forgot to have kids first.

 :facepalm:

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us Offline Alan K.

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #4 on: March 23, 2024, 01:31:36 AM
Funny like that should hurt. :facepalm:
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us Offline WhichDawg

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #5 on: March 23, 2024, 02:53:00 AM
I laughed  :salute:

us Offline AzteCypher

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #6 on: March 24, 2024, 05:57:16 AM
 :rofl: :rofl:
I have to share this one with my son.  We're always going back and forth with the dad jokes.  He's even been gifted several dad joke books.
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ca Offline Grant Lamontagne

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #7 on: March 24, 2024, 12:36:54 PM
While you are at it, here are a few more:

The other day my son asked me for a bookmark.  I was heartbroken because he's 14 years old and doesn't even know my name is Steve.

Did you hear that scientists have been able to calculate the mass of a rainbow?  Turns out it's pretty light.

How do you throw a party in space?  You planet.

When you see divers going on the water, do you know why you always see them fall backwards off the boat?  Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat.

You know when you see birds migrating in a V formation, and you always see one side of the V is longer than the other?  Ever wonder why that is?  There's more birds on that side.

My local radio station has a call in line where you call and leave a message for them to play on the airm. Usually it's someone complaining about something and then the deejays make fun of them.  I call in and leave these jokes so frequently that they have started calling me "The Dad Joke Guy.".  :D

Def
Leave the dents as they are- let your belongings show their scars as proudly as you do yours.
Merit Badges Take part in the christmas pool or a rak type giveaway. Those wanting to say thank you for a rak may also nominate for the santa. For those who posted like a boss. Post your pocket dump photos then challenge two more members who must post their pocket dump photos within 24hrs for you to get the badge. Start a new thread with a photo of custom or non standard SAK scales in your collection Start a thread with a photo of a repair you made with duct tape Start a new thread including a photo of shooting at least two (2) different airguns and at least one (1) photo of target (airguns) Start a thread with a photo of at least ten OPT's in your collection Must start a thread with a photo of at least five (5) of your watches Must start a thread showing a photo of at least eight BO tools Start a thread with photos of at least 1 MTO branded tool in your collection Start a new thread showing photos of your outdoor cooking Must have a review written in the proper format and posted on the Main Site Start a new thread with a photo of at least 5 different Charge models in your collection

us Offline AzteCypher

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #8 on: March 25, 2024, 06:06:13 AM
 :rofl: :rofl:  Nice!!

Here's one of our favorites.

How does Darth Vader like his toast?  A little on the dark side.
May the best of your past, be the worst of your future.

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ca Offline Grant Lamontagne

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #9 on: March 25, 2024, 11:51:02 PM
Good one.

Did you ever hear about Darth Vader's sister Ella?

She had her ups and downs.

 :D

Def
Leave the dents as they are- let your belongings show their scars as proudly as you do yours.
Merit Badges Take part in the christmas pool or a rak type giveaway. Those wanting to say thank you for a rak may also nominate for the santa. For those who posted like a boss. Post your pocket dump photos then challenge two more members who must post their pocket dump photos within 24hrs for you to get the badge. Start a new thread with a photo of custom or non standard SAK scales in your collection Start a thread with a photo of a repair you made with duct tape Start a new thread including a photo of shooting at least two (2) different airguns and at least one (1) photo of target (airguns) Start a thread with a photo of at least ten OPT's in your collection Must start a thread with a photo of at least five (5) of your watches Must start a thread showing a photo of at least eight BO tools Start a thread with photos of at least 1 MTO branded tool in your collection Start a new thread showing photos of your outdoor cooking Must have a review written in the proper format and posted on the Main Site Start a new thread with a photo of at least 5 different Charge models in your collection

ch Offline Etherealicer

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #10 on: March 27, 2024, 04:21:24 PM
Quote from: Grant Lamontagne on March 24, 2024, 12:36:54 PM
How do you throw a party in space?  You planet.
This reminds me of that:
Why do people go to the moon on holidays?
To decompress

and also
Why do people go to Switzerland to meditate?
To enter a neutral state.
It wouldn't be the internet without people complaining.

hr Offline styx

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Re: Sometimes I am so funny it hurts
Reply #11 on: March 28, 2024, 08:01:10 PM
that is a proper dad joke and i love it
Solving problems you didn't know you had in the most obscure way possible

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