Some of my favorite sayings

[Grant Lamontagne]

My teacher in my 8th grade math class had a lot of sayings posted around the classroom, and many of them have stuck with me to this day, and these sayings make up the bulk of what I learned in 8th Grade math... 

When in deep water it is best to keep the mouth shut.

A man who is good for an excuse is good for little else.


They were uncredited at the time, but if anyone knows where they came from, please let me know as these words of wisdom have largely shaped my life.

Another one that has had an impact on me is one I always thought was a US President, but apparently is attributable to a Canadian scientist named Orlando Aloysius Battista.  Who knew?  Anyway, the quote is:

An error doesn't become a mistake until you refuse to correct it.

The last one I can recall that I wanted to share right now is another Canadian, a professor and media pioneer named Marshall MacLuhan who pointed out that the way in which a message is presented has profound impact on the way the message is received.  He said:

The medium isn't more important than the message, the media IS the message.

According to the BBC:



Of course this is a concept that is as deep or as shallow as you want to get into it.  The simplest example is imagining someone comes to your door at dusk and tells you that your car lights were left on.  You would appreciate that, despite the apprehension of a stranger being at your door.  Now take the same scenario, the same message, only instead of someone politely knocking on your door, they instead write it on a scrap of paper, tie it to a rock and throw it through your window.  You probably wouldn't appreciate it as much, despite it being the exact same message, and the intent in both cases is to keep you from having a dead battery when you try to start your car the next morning.  Sure that's a simplification, but the principle stays the same on all levels and has always fascinated me.

Actually, I have one more that I just thought of.... and it was one my mother always said.

Everything in moderation.

About the only thing not in moderation in my house growing up was that saying, and I still rail against it almost every day. 

That's about it for now- what sayings have motivated or guided you?

Def

[zoidberg]

It's all relative.

[Grant Lamontagne]

That's the slogan for a dating site in Arkansas, isn't it?   

Def

[dks]

Boys will be Boys

[Syncop8r]

"Keep an open mind, but not so open that your brains fall out." - (attributed to many)
"Up here for thinking, down there for dancing - don't get 'em mixed." - Mr Baldwin, Woodwork Teacher

[gregozedobe]

"Beware fanatics"

"Just when you think you've finally made something foolproof you will come across a more inventive fool" (there are many, many different variations on this one).

"The best way to be happy is to only compare down, never compare up." ("I used to complain about having no shoes until I met a man with no feet.")

"An opinion is like an *sshole, everyone has one."  ( "My opinions are facts, yours are just stories.")

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."  (Mark Twain ? )

[pfrsantos]

"Better bo be rich and healthy than poor and sick."

"All generalizations are false."

[pfrsantos]

Boys will be Boys

Not anymore...

 

[sLaughterMed]

"Failure is in the eye of the beholder"
-sLaughterMed

[Whoey]

I think my wife will vouch for my affinity with:
"we'll cross that bridge when we come to it"

also, although perhaps less used:
"The elevator doesn't go all the way to the top"
"the lights are on, but nobodies home"
etc

[jerseydevil]

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
       -Groucho Marx

[Yadda]

"I see I forget, I do I remember."  From the wall above the chalkboard 7th grade Math. 

"Where there's smoke there's fire."   - One of my Father's and Grandfather's favorite quotes. 

"Same difference."  A common southern phrase when comparing two options that are similar. 

[Pacu]

Life ain't easy when you're fat and greasy.
Best stock up on beans and bullets.
Treat your _____ with care, they cost money!

---Dad.

[jerseydevil]

One of my grandmother's standards when you tried to sell her a story. "I was born at night, but not last night".

[Semajmarx007]

A teacher of mine shared this at class when I was still in 2nd grade.

Good better best, don't let it rest. Until good becomes better and better becomes best!

Still works and planning to teach it to my daughter when she can already appreciate such things.

For and from the wife, it's two:

Never assume. Because when you assume, you make an a** of u and me

Can't tell you how much this has saved me hahaha.

Lastly, it would be that patience is a virtue

[ColoSwiss]

Suppose you were a fool. And suppose you were a legislator. But I repeat myself.

No man's life, liberty or property is safe while the legislature is in session.

I am not to be outdone for lack of invention.   

All Mark Twain

[sLaughterMed]

Heres a "serious" one.

My Granddad was a funny man. He was quite famous for his crooked half smiles, and his wit.
Whenever he was asked "are you alright?" His response, without fail, was one of his famous crooked smiles, and the phrase "half left"

[jerseydevil]

"Dear reader, assume you were a menber of Congress. And assume you were an idiot. But I repeat myself"
-Mark Twain

"There are three kinds of lies -lies, damned lies, and statistics"
- Benjamin Disraeli

[jerseydevil]

"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
-Groucho Marx

[Crow]

No need to whine anymore, when you already cr*pped in your pants.

[styx]

It's easier to let the cat out of the bag than it is to put it back in the bag.

It doesn't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

Don't squat with your spurs on.

If you think you're somebody big, try ordering another man's dog around.

Better to have less thunder in the mouth and more lightning in the hand.

Speak softly and carry a big stick

[Etherealicer]

"E rächte Ma het es Mässer im Sack" - "a real man has a knife in his pockets"

[Etherealicer]

It doesn't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

Are you sure?

[pfrsantos]

For those of you that work in programming:

"Constants aren't, variables won't."

"Every program you code takes 50% more time than you thought it would, even if you took this in consideration to begin with."

[pfrsantos]

[Grathr]

There is a difference between farting and smurfting your pants.

[Steinar]

Today was an average day. Worse than yesterday, better than tomorrow.

[Okie Shyster]

Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder.

That explains how you wake up next to someone who is "coyote ugly."   

[captain spaulding]

My grandfather would always tell me "A goal without a plan is just a wish."

He would also always say "It's all about planning and scheduling."



I know there are a bunch more form my father and grandfather, but I cannot think of them now.



EDIT: I just remembered one that I really have lived my life by for better or worse. When I was probably 12 my dad told me "No one can ever make you do anything you do not want to do." Those words have shaped me incredibly. Sometimes for the good and other times not so good. I would not have it any other way though. I cannot even begin to explain how many situations in my life I have thought of these words spoken to me and acted accordingly. Even in situations where people tell you, you have no other option, you ALWAYS have another option. You control your life, not anyone else.

[bmot]

Before you criticise a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticise him, you'll be a mile away and you'll have his shoes.